The first time I became responsible for traveling alone with my daughter, she was 13, and I was a wreck. Worry about handling all the arrangements on my own was a relative minor concern compared to worries over Lucy having a good time. After all, if she didn’t, there would be no one to blame but me. Moreover, friends had told me that traveling with a young teen was one of life’s peak challenges. A four-year-old can be kept busy for hours with a few Legos; a ten-year old can be happy with paper and coloring pens. But at 13, a child’s critical faculties are entering a period of maximum utility. Regardless of the situation, she or he can find something to criticize.
But I was determined to make this pas de deux work, as there would be quite a few more in the future before she was on her own. Besides, I wanted this to be an event that we would both remember as being a happy time.
So the first question was where should we go. I knew if I asked Lucy, she’d say, "I don’t care," as she invariably does when I ask her to make a choice about anything. But if I gave her a few alternatives, it might be easier to get an answer.
I ran through a bunch of possibilities. A city? No, we’d end up spending too much time and money shopping. A beach resort? Not a good idea, we both have the type of skin that burns easily in the sun. A driving circuit for family visits? Are you kidding?
What was left? And then it hit me—a soft adventure expedition, with enough activity to keep Lucy too busy to complain and not exceed my physical capabilities.
With lots of help from our travel agent, we chose a rainforest resort in Costa Rica where there was more to do than we could squeeze into our ten days—birding, trail hiking, hot springs, river trips, visits to a volcano and no end of animal and reptile life that we had never seen outside of a zoo.
I know the trip was a success, because we continue to talk about it to this day. It made choosing our subsequent vacations a joint effort with little or no stress. That first experience of traveling together primed us for all the good times that followed.
If you have any stories or advice about vacationing with young teens, I’d surely enjoy receiving them.
Paula "On My Own" Gifford